I hate my co-workers!
Boss Vador strikes again, nothing is
ever good enough for this frantic lunatic. Everyone hates him except Slither,
his spine-less news carrying servant. Pink Wolf got on my nerves today too with
her acute perfection disorder. For a woman that makes sure all her desk
accessories are the exact shade of pink, you would think she would see to it the
hair on her chin gets removed regularly. Cubicle Troll has it out for me big
deliberately locked me in the office yesterday knowing I have to stay late every
night until Mother Rabbit returns from maternity leave.. again.
Luckily Pack Rat
the office supply thief, was still in the office waiting for everyone to leave and he
had a key to let us out. Well, at least I made an attempt to report Troll
this morning. I heard Spider Boy saw him lock the door, so I asked him to stand
up for me. He backed out at the last minute, and I should've known
better too. Not only does he use his sticky tentacles to lift pens off your
desk, but he's parallel to an insect, spine less. I bet Nag Hag told him not to
do it, she hates me. A seventy six year old half-deaf nag who can't even figure
out why there's a "wheel thing-ie" on top of the computer mouse. Yet,
every morning she reads the papers and wonders why so many young people sit and
collect unemployment checks. -sigh
Posted by "?" on Friday
Anonymous commenter said...
You're not anonymous!! The
network administrator tracked your office computer and we found this
blog url on the server. Now get back to work before I fire you for being
Baby handouts again??
I don't believe this. Pink Wolf is
still bugging me about that baby shower donation. For so long I was supposed to turn
it in for
Mother Rabbit's office baby shower, which was three months ago. This was her fifth office baby
shower in less than seven years. Well, I kept putting off Wolf until Mother Rabbit
had the baby, which was three weeks ago. I figured I would have been off the hook by
this time. Well I figured wrong and it's a shame too. I actually thought my hard earned tax
money would have been quite sufficient already.
You know, come to think of it, a
couple of us had nervous breakdowns in the office last year. I don't remember
anyone giving or collecting hospital and Prozac donations. You know at this
point, she should allow me to claim one of her children on my tax. This is more
than ridiculous, I have to put my foot down. I don't even want to see any
more of those kiddie school donations/raffles
things from anyone else in the office at this point on.
Posted by "?" on Thursday
More paper work!
Everywhere I turn paper and more
paper is in my face. Where did all this darn paper work come from? I just knew I
should have asked for a written job description when I first came to work here.
I'm paying for it up to my neck with paperwork on my desk to complete. You would think with the
computer era these idiots would utilize this modern revelation. The office
manager walks around saying "make accuracy with speed your best friend at the
end of the day". Oh yeah, keep it up with all this paper work and I'll make the
shredder my best friend at the end of the day.
Posted by "?" on Wednesday
Need a good excuse
Everybody is driving me NUTS. I need
a really good excuse to stay home from work. At this point I'm hoping to get
jury duty in the mail, if not, pink eye or pneumonia would do. The only
practical solution I can think of is to follow someone in the office who
has a cold and pray I catch it. Oh well, I guess I could always pretend to get
carpal tunnel syndrome or "accidentally" throw myself down the office stairs in
front of witnesses. Maybe I should stay late in the office until the
exterminator guy comes. I could tell everyone I inhaled the fumes, or maybe he
might be willing to say he accidentally squirt some in my eye. Well, maybe
someone might call in a bomb treat tomorrow or something, I always use the
payphone on the second floor.
Posted by "?" on Tuesday
I guess I'm trying out this
blogging thing, don't know what to write yet. From the looks of things
in the office today, I'm sure an inspiration will come up soon
posted by "?" on Monday